the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
