I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
