I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
