if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
