I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
