Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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