So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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