So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
My ass is underappreciated
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
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