and you said cock pushups were impossible
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
