I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Randomize
