I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
