I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
