Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
