i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
He shit in the fireplace
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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