From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
