jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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