I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
