That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
