Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
