Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
