Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
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