Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
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