bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
