people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
