took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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