I am in a vortex of obligation.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Found the puke drawer
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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