Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
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