would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
