I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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