Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
