just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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