you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize
