I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
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