You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
