I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
