I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
