I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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