hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
My bed smells like the plague
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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