haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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