Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
