You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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