i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
