Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
