This girl is more easily done than said...
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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