You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
