But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
my sisters under your porch take her home
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
