Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
