I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
you would pick up someone in the library
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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