Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
i've created a new STD.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize
