I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
We had sex on a dog bed..
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
