Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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